Enabling or Helping

What’s on my mind as it’s 5:00 am on a Friday, or better yet what isn’t. Why do our minds decide to work triple time when we are trying to SLEEP!?

Being a parent to six children has come with many sleepless nights over the years ranging from colic to a multitude of a million other reasons!


Before going to bed last night I was listening to Dave Ramsey. A caller had asked a question we have been faced with several times,"should we let our troubled twenty some year old move back in our home?" It seems like a very easy question to answer from the outside. The truth is it’s NOT, it has proven to be one of the hardest if not THE hardest decisions we have had to make as parents! It really comes down to two choices. Do we let our child live on the streets or with God knows who, or do we allow them to live with us under certain rules and conditions that we know they will most likely break?



This decision is not easy and certainly is not as cut and try and without emotion as it may seem . This is the same child you rocked to sleep for at night or when they were sad You wipes their tears. The same one you put on the kindergarten bus and were so tiny they could barely make it up the big bus steps. The same child who won the "most like Jesus" award in Sunday school class and the same one who cried every single time you dropped him off at second grade. The same one who received only positive comments from his teachers and the one who received the "most humble" soccer player award in high school.


Here’s the thing… We are never supposed to make major life decisions based on emotion. Parenthood kind of throws that a curve ball as all those memories cloud judgement I am left with what could I live with if the worst would happen and I didn’t do enough.

With strict rules in place my 20 something child moved back under our roof.
So as I lay here at 5:00 am August 2, I know my child is safe. At least for tonight!

Spring is here

HAPPY SPRING!

Wow the first day of spring already. I know many of you are saying finally, but i'm saying, it seems like It was just Christmas! 

What do you look forward to the most about spring? I love the green grass and the flowers beginning to bloom. The smell of new fresh cut grass and feeling the warm sunshine after the cold winter. I love seeing the baby bunnies hoping around in the yard. I love finally being able to open the deck door and feeling the breeze.

As a kid spring meant more time outside playing with friends and the anticipation of summer vacation just around the corner. It meant Easter egg hunts, Easter baskets and more chocolate candy than anyone could imagine.

What does being mean to you or what is your favorite memory of spring!

Addiction UPDATE

As many of you know our family suffers with constant and continual fear. The fear is real and horrifying, with the ramifications of the aftermath having the potential to be nothing short of complete devastation. Its a monster that could rear it ugly head at ANY given day or hour. This monster is know as Addiction. It effects our son who is otherwise a normal functioning individual who was once a superstar athlete as well as an honor student in the not so distant past.

This is what I live by

How have things been? 
Lots of people who care and love us and him always ask as i'm sure many of you wonder. This is a question that is a tough one to answer. Right now, at this moment things seem to be fairly calm. Good?
 No, I wouldn't say good, as that is a word is reserved for a time, hopefully in the future, when I can say with certainly that things are good. A time when any remains of the addition are long in the past with the clouds gone and the sun shining consecutively for some time. A time that when if we haven't heard from our son for a day doesn't lead to our minds wondering to crazy scary thoughts immediately. A time when an unknown local number calling doesn't sink our heart to our feet. OR when the stress of all the stress leads to short tempers between family members!

We live in constant fear..as we continue to pray! Meanwhile our marriage and family are along for the bumpy ride they call Addiction and I call pure and simple HELL!!!

Our Pennsylvania Christmas 2018 (a little late)

I know I am several weeks late writing this Christmas blog, but better late than never. 

Our Christmas's here in Pa are usually cold and sometimes we have snow. This year we had the cold, but unfortunately we did not have snow. The weeks leading up to Christmas were a little crazy as I had had surgery Nov. 30. For the most part, we were ready for the big day!

As always Kaylee and Jaxson came to stay for several days. Jaxson, being four, is at the perfect age for the magic of Christmas. From him explaining Mary and Josephs travels to Bethlehem where baby Jesus was born, to being intrigued about Santa Claus and the elves. Its truly a magical age and we love reliving it through him!

Christmas morning we have everyone here for gift opening and breakfast.We had a large selection of food, coffee, juices and of course mimosas. Our local donut shop had the BEST Santa donuts which were delicious! I decided to break an 11+ year tradition and make two new casserole dishes for breakfast. They were delicious and I will definitely make them again next year! 

After everyone got their food, we headed in the family room to open presents. Santa had come and Jaxson wasn't waiting any longer!!!

Every year there is what I call a "Gift of the year", which is one thing most of the girls in our family ask for, want, or need. Last year it was Sperry duck boots. The year before it was Vineyard Vines everything. This year it was a titanium hair straightener and Patagonia jackets. The family gift, which was a surprise for even my husband, was the Nintendo Switch. I love this gaming system as it has lots of classic Mario Brother Games and other classics. So far it has been a huge hit for the entire family!

As another Holiday season ends, I am reminded once again that time with family and friends is what really matters in life. This year we were very blessed to have the entire family together under one roof! We are so thankful for this and realize it may not always be this way...

And to all a good night!!!

New Year, New Me

Happy 2019 Everyone!
 As most people have made their resolutions, this will be the first year in my lifetime that I am actually doing the same. I have never made them as I just think that if I really want to do something bad enough I will do it whether its the New Year or not. Not to mention that 80% of New Years resolutions fail by February! Never the less this year I am making them. Lets see how many I can keep!

First, I am going to try to trust in God more than ever before and try to worry less about things I can't control! (easier said than done)

Second, I want to loose at least 20 pounds this year. I have already lost 7 since Nov so i'm on my way...I'm not going to mention that most of that was due to a major surgery I had to have...LOL

Third, I want to start to be more positive and talk less crap about people who annoy me. (just being honest)

Forth, I want to be a better wife! I don't want to let the little things (like weird behaviors of my husband) make me go insane or just get mean. I want all the small things that really don't matter to roll off of my back.

Fifth and Final, I want to spend less money on things we or I don't really need! Its so hard especially when new seasons began and so many pretty things come out...Note to myself...stay out of Hobby Lobby and Homegoods!

A bonus Resolution of course...I am going to blog much more this year...once a week hopefully!

Stayed tuned to see how I am doing with my resolutions with monthly updates and early next week look for a 2018 Christmas in Pa Blog!